Naijarita News

Over the last several centuries, we’ve seen the birth of a variety of ideologies. Capitalism. Socialism. Marxism. Libertarianism. Communism. Anarchism. Anarcho-Capitalism. Fascism. But never have we seen an ideology that is truly homegrown from the intellectually fertile soils of Nigeria.

A Nigerian blogger known as David has released a political dictionary to help Nigerians understand political news reporting better. Here are some of the important terms defined in the insightful dictionary:

A Nairaland member has given ten good reasons why we need third term for Obasanjo and the Action Governors:

The time and effort required for each Naijarita News article far exceeds its popularity and profitability, so please be patient as I try to put together an editorial team of trained journalists and humorists to create Nigerian news satire for the web, radio, TV and newspapers. Meanwhile, here are some short stories:

A 25 year old woman has agreed to say “I do” to her secondary school sweetheart after 7 years of rejecting his marriage proposals. Eyewitnesses report that her decision to say “yes” after seven years of saying “no, no, no” are unrelated to his current status as a well-paid oil company executive.

Chief Olusegun Obasanjo, honorable president of Nigeria, has threatened to jeopardize the Super Eagles’ chances of winning the ongoing African Cup of Nations by freezing the NFA account if Nigerians fail to show evidence of overwhelming support for his 3rd term bid by tomorrow morning. He delivered the threat in an early morning radio broadcast:

In recognition of the monumental role played by Nigerian blogs in the year 2005 the Naijarita News team has created the Nigerian Weblog Awards 2005 to honour exceptional bloggers from Nigeria. Can you believe that we already have 132 blogs in a country of only 120 million people? Phenomenal, isn’t it?

Political leaders have criticized Pastor E.A. Adeboye of the Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG) for his prophecies for 2007 released many months in advance. The prophecies have led to spontaneous eruptions of religious and ethnic disinterest, apathy, and inability-to-give-a-damn all over the country.

Anointed Pastor Chris Oyakhilome of Christ Embassy has exposed a plot by the Almighty God and his angels to put a stop to the broadcasting of miracles on Nigerian television. During the shocking exposé, he narrated how all efforts to get his miracles verified have been mysteriously frustrated.

Happy new year, loyal followers of Naijarita News! Here are our predictions for the year 2006 in Nigeria’s political scene:

Popular Nigerian blogger Tim Akinbo, creator of the Nigerian Weblog Ring, has lost his job at TimbaObjects after a series of controversial posts on his blog. The sole proprietor says he fired himself because it was the right thing to do.

Hot-tempered Nigerian forum administrator Seun Osewa has been arrested and charged with treasonable felony after inadvertently calling President Obasanjo an “inconsequential idiot”.

When Elizabeth Grimm arrived in Nigeria, she didn’t expect to end up in a lunatic asylum after taking 14 innocent lives. We decided to interview her to find out what would push a self-respecting young European tourist to do what she did.

Nigerians want to know why the Naira sign is missing from the new 1000 naira note. Here’s why: the Central Bank of Nigeria wants to phase out the Naira sign because it brings us bad luck.

Excessive web traffic is the bane of every successful website. You labor to build a nice website, publicize it on every webboard you visit, call all your friends about it, put a link in the signature of every email you send and then people start visiting. Argh!

The Naijarita News website aims to entertain Nigerians by posting hilarious and thought-provoking fake news.