New Nigerian Political Dictionary ReleasedA Nigerian blogger known as David has released a political dictionary to help Nigerians understand political news reporting better. Here are some of the important terms defined in the insightful dictionary:
Senate: Presidential rubber stamp for unpopular laws and illegal constitutional ammendments.
Babacracy: Unitary system of Governnment headed by a powerful life President. Minimum age of 60 required. See also, Nigerian “democracy”.
Chief: Traditional title sold by traditional rulers to the highest bidder.
Honorary degree: A “doctorate” degree confered on an individual by a higher Institution primarily as a form of political patronage.
Privatisation: Sale of public property to members of a countries’ ruling political party and other sycophants.
BPE: Bureau of Private Enrichment. See also, Privatisation.
Runway: Recreation park for cattle
Democracy defenders: People who “oppose” the ruling party on the basis of their exclusion from revenue “sharing.”
No-go-area: The real problem with a country that are not supposed to be discussed while trivial matters are being discussed. See also, Federalism, resource control, e.t.c
Court order: Worthless piece of paper that is not binding on the Presidential and Legislative arms of government.
Sacred cows: Members of the ruling party of a nation.
Universities: Nigerian synonym for glorified secondary schools.
Probe panel: Job opportunity for unemployed political hangers-on. See also, constitutional reform committee, Oputa panel e.t.c
Mantu (n) m-a-n-t-o-o: A tool used for illegal manipulation of constitutions.
Third term (adj) thûrd tûrm: Nigerian euphemism for life Presidency.
Public hearing (adj) pub•lic hîr ng: Secret meetings held by Politicians with the aim of feathering their own nests.
Patriotism (adv) p tr - -t z m : A word used to describe unquestionable loyalty to the President.
Election (n) -l k sh n: Selection of party loyalists by the President to political office.
Blueprint: A government paper detailing fantasy white elephant projects. Used primarily as a political tool to deceive the people.
Communique/report: worthless piece of document released at the close of lectures, seminars, probe panels and or committees. Usually contains grandiose speeches, unrealistic goals, castles in the air e.t.c See also, National political Reform committee report, Vision 2010 report.
Budget: Annual ritual by the legislative and Presidential arms of Government detailing resource meant to be “shared” amongst the three tiers of Political office holders.
Ecological fund: Money meant for electioneering campaigns, sharing among party chieftains, foreign bank accounts e.t.c See also, Dariye
Security Vote: Pocket money meant for Political office holders.
Sources:
- http://davidylan.blogspot.com/2006/03/know-your-nigerian-political.html
- http://davidylan.blogspot.com/2006/03/nigerian-political-dictionary-ii.html
I don’t know, but isn’t this dictionary itself quite unpatriotic?
unpatriotic indeed! i “wholeheartedly” support baba for life presidency. i am more patriotic than Ibrahim Mantu!